New Year's Eve

Ah, the New Year. A holiday advertised as a time for new beginnings, where people can start over and this year, really become the person they have always wanted to be. But gyms have the sold, but unused gym memberships to prove that not a lot changes when January first rolls around. It’s a day, like any other day, but people imagine it to have this magical power that it simply doesn’t.

New Year’s Eve can be frustrating because it’s a huge party night with an insensitive reminder at midnight that the single individuals are, indeed, alone. No matter how much fun the singles were having before midnight, having no midnight kiss is always at least a little bit of a blow. Last year, I spent New Year’s Eve with Mike at his friend’s house. Even though that was my only New Year’s Eve with a boyfriend, the thought of being alone this year felt so much worse than previous years.

Most of my friends and I graduated college this past spring, so we thought it would be nice to do something subjectively adult for New Year’s Eve this year. We booked two tables at a catering hall and when Tuesday night rolled around, I put on this strapless black and white dress I had bought on clearance months ago. I was happy to be finally wearing it!

Of course to contradict the adult nature of the event, my mom drove my girlfriends and me to the catering hall two towns over. None of us were driving because it was an open bar and hello, responsible. We walked in to see most of our other friends already there. The two tables were made up of a bunch of our guy friends who I’ve known since high school and some of their girlfriends, along with a few random acquaintances.

We quickly greeted everyone before making our way over to the bar. James, our friend’s old college roommate, was in line in front of us. “Hello, ladies,” he said to us all with a huge smile. We talked for a few minutes before reaching the front of the line. He ordered two jack and cokes.

“Are you here with someone?” I asked. James was kind of the token single guy. He would come out with us to bars in the city throughout college and hit on the most desperate looking girl in the place. It usually worked out for him. He wasn’t ugly but he also wasn’t particularly good looking. He knew who to hit on, though.

“No, they’re both for me,” he said with a wink. He placed a five in the tip jar and grabbed both drinks. “I expect to see all of you on the dance floor later!”

My friend, Anna, wasted no time before ordering two glasses of white wine. “He has the right idea,” she excitedly said. We all followed suite and ordered two drinks each. It was an open bar after all and the line was only getting longer as more people arrived.

I practically inhaled my two cranberry vodkas and ordered two more before dinner was even served. I ate a piece of bread and a few bites of chicken marsala before returning to the dance floor, where it seemed that people were really channeling their inner Britneys. It wasn’t long before James and I were the only two of our group left dancing. Everyone was going back up for seconds at the buffet, taking bathroom breaks, or getting in line for drinks. I’ve had a high stamina for dancing since my days of attending Sweet 16s and James made for an excellent partner.

James took my hand and started twirling me around the dance floor. I noticed an annoyed look or two from other dancers, but what did we care? We were both hammered at this point and having a blast.

It only took a few more twirls until James pulled me in close. My back was to him as our pelvises swayed together to the music. After a couple more songs, I turned to face him and we couldn’t be any closer without kissing. Maybe New Year’s Eve would be a new start. I had no idea what James wanted that night, if anything, but I’d be grateful for anything to distract me from thinking about Mike all the time.

I was waiting for him to make a move when he gave me a playful shove instead. “You’re such a tease,” he said without missing a beat in his dance routine, which I came to assume was previously choreographed.

“What?”

“You’re never going to cheat on Mike.”

Well, so much for a distraction. I was standing still, while he was still dancing. “We broke up,” I responded.

“When?” He asked with a puzzled look on his face. I couldn’t tell if he didn’t believe me or if he was genuinely just asking. I didn’t even answer before motioning to the restroom and putting my index finger up to let him know I was taking a bathroom break, even though I had no intention of returning to the dance floor. If he thought I had a boyfriend, why would I dance with him like that? Would he have kissed me if he thought I’d let him?

Once in the restroom, I found Anna. She had made friends with a nice middle-aged woman. “Do you see this, Caroline?” she screamed while pointing to the party hat on her head. “Meredith gave it to me!” She polished off her almost empty white wine before breaking out into a hysterical laughter.

“Okay, let’s get you back to the table,” I said. James’ comment sobered me right up and for the rest of the night, I became the nurturing mother. When midnight struck, I had no midnight kiss but I was surrounded by my amazing friends. Maybe I still wasn’t over Mike, but it was okay. I had fun, even on my own. Who needs a man anyway?